can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
