Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
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