youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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