I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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