If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?