been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
