Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
