I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize