she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
