Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
