Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize