but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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