Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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