I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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