do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
