Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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