if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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