She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
