u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Randomize
