awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
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Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
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I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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