Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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