You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
