Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
