It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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