Texts From Last Night

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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.

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  (602): Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho. http://tfl.nu/5bol
  Replies (34) Good night (1805) Bad night (4746)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.

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  (313): I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays. http://tfl.nu/hsxj
  Replies (12) Good night (939) Bad night (3873)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  did you answer or finish?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  both

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  (404): Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called? (1-404): did you answer or finish? (404): both http://tfl.nu/gzoz
  Replies (27) Good night (7522) Bad night (1137)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.

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  (908): Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic. http://tfl.nu/hh2b
  Replies (33) Good night (4214) Bad night (5296)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.

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  (902): driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are. http://tfl.nu/vxum
  Replies (17) Good night (5170) Bad night (1323)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time

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  (808): I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time http://tfl.nu/zdse
  Replies (5) Good night (1122) Bad night (2174)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?

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  (503): I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!? http://tfl.nu/h2a2
  Replies (9) Good night (3424) Bad night (812)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.

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  (205): Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it. http://tfl.nu/qoct
  Replies (15) Good night (2444) Bad night (755)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk

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  (613): Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk http://tfl.nu/x5i0
  Replies (6) Good night (1548) Bad night (626)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"

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  (780): Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl" http://tfl.nu/k17c
  Replies (2) Good night (1072) Bad night (521)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.

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  (309): I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne. http://tfl.nu/l6oj
  Replies (2) Good night (443) Bad night (379)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"

  (571): View more from Virginia

  why not an indie porn pic then

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  (202): And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr" (571): why not an indie porn pic then http://tfl.nu/a81c
  Replies (2) Good night (776) Bad night (353)
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  (483): View more from

  How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?

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  (483): How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers? http://tfl.nu/0ubo
  Replies (2) Good night (340) Bad night (184)
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  (226): View more from Ontario

  We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.

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  (226): We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship. http://tfl.nu/oapm
  Replies (2) Good night (501) Bad night (178)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?

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  (734): Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up? http://tfl.nu/3eiv
  Replies (2) Good night (373) Bad night (186)

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