toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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