My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
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