What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
