Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it