i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
he puts the penis in happiness.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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