Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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