Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
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We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
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Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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