Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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