I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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