Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
