the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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