Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
