Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize