glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Randomize