I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize