remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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