After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
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