so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
