I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize