How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
