She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
