they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
