We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beer is more important than you right now.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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