do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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