Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Randomize