I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
A+ Viking dick
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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