Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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