Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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